And we love you. Who else is going to provide us with good ass dialing stories :)
Greta
· 1 month ago
Awwww! We love you too :] <3 The #LOFNOTC was seriously the best time I've had in a while and I cannot wait for Friday to come for a little more of that action xD I have a halloween costume to finish that evening, but I'm sure I can make it all work... I'm sorry you're stressed and away from the music. The emails must be slightly devastating, though exciting in a way. You are getting to see everyone else's stories and fun, seeing parts of lives that you'd never see otherwise. I understand the meta-narcissism. I'm similar with my dancing. SO PRACTICE FOR US! ;D You'll enjoy it in the end and it's more exciting for us to follow the ENTIRE PROCESS versus just seeing the end product. It's a whole lot more awesome out of one person and piece of music.
SO as always, warmest wishes. We love you :] Greta.
bookandbroom
· 1 month ago
"my whole life here feels like an attic or a basement, but never a kitchen."
I just read this to my boyfriend because I thought it was FUCKING GENIUS, in a small and perfect way. You have to have the kitchen. Not just for the coffee and the wineglasses and whatever food you feel like that day — cheap burritos or a giant feast or whatEVER – but because kitchens are the unsung places where things Happen. (That Lemonheads song is so true.) At parties, the best people wind up in the kitchen. Ideas spring forth from countertops, I swear.
tim_{d}
· 1 month ago
if you haven't read it, you might enjoy banana yoshimoto's (novella? story?) "kitchen" -- she treats the kitchen-as-locus idea in a quiet, simple, rain-on-the-windowpanes way that's really very sweet.
Tanuki
· 1 month ago
aww, lovely :D Good luck for everything, Amanda and keep the crazy going! <3
chriscon
· 1 month ago
aw, sweet blog. im sorry you miss neil & im sorry you have so many motherfucking emails. move to NY, because i plan on living there when im older. i love you
Chelseathepolock
· 1 month ago
chickchickachaaaaa.
you're coolness makes all the peeps happy. the new years show will slay; no worries, dearest.
and being from the tri-state, I happily endorse your move to nyc. just saying (we aren't as cold and have better bagels).
kyprieth
· 1 month ago
Your blogs always seem to give me that happy warm glow and at the same time get me to think about interesting, complicated, strange new things. I love your internet.
Lars
· 1 month ago
I'm so sorry that I missed e.e. cummings loving CAPSLOCK, but it just made my Sunday instead. <3
lillylionised
· 1 month ago
darling amanda, move to new york and revel in the glorious chaos of it all (a friend told me the other day that he thought brooklyn was more confusing than amsterdam...pshhh). feel better about all the virtual paperwork...
love and awesomexx lilly lionised
BrassyCassy
· 1 month ago
I LOVE AMANDA.
Oh, and how does one manage to put separate pictures together in order to make a mega-mosaic picture? (Like you did with the four Beatles photos?) I've always wondered ... and am hoping I don't need to own some fancy software, like Photoshop, LoL ... :P
PS. Amanda, thank you for being awesome. I hope you come to Perth Australia again so I can see you perform in person, unlike last time. Please tell Neil that Alice the PhD student he spoke to at Worldcon says hi. xx
Lilou
· 1 month ago
From France : Tu es superbe, surtout ne change pas ! Je t'aiiime !!
Marjorie
· 1 month ago
I missed the party but am loving the catch-up. Sorry you're missing Neil, but happy for you both that you'll get to catch up soon. and so glad that you are happy in your life :-)
katie
· 1 month ago
Email..... if you have gmail (who doesnt have gmail..) fiddle around with filters and labels.... that way, you can tackle one subject matter at a time and it might make it feel like less a chore (or ignore subject matter easily)
xoxox katie
BurntCarousel
· 1 month ago
Looks like it was fun and makes me wish I used twitter more. Man, e.e. cummings loving caps lock made me laugh out loud, which makes you look a little crazy in a dorm room by yourself.
Ryan_Anas
· 1 month ago
Yeah, being away from home for long outs will almost always give it the feeling of a soulless storage unit when you come back, but that being said, I would chosse New York over Boston any day. Nothing against Boston or anything, but NEW YORK!!
#lofnotc is pretty special. It's nice to not feel so alone, and trending as quickly as it did was really amazing. Thanks for always keeping the party going.
Best of luck tonight, and thank you for always doing something fresh, amazing, and special. Love you too. =)
hypeshooter
· 1 month ago
I love you to Amanda. You are real. You have musings and you rock my world. you really made my night getting back to me on twitter. Enjoy your day!
KaylaConspiracy
· 1 month ago
I ended up missing most of #LOFNOTC this week. :( I was being a loser, but not on the computer.
I did, however, catch the end of it while it was still trending. I must say, it's amazing the community you've managed to create with #LOFNOTC. Becase of it, I've met a number of interesting, talented, and amazing people. People that make the world a little less lonely. Parties on the internet are awesome (especially since you don't have to worry about what you're gonna wear or if the music's gonna suck or not) and I can't wait to see where you take it now. Viva #LOFNOTC!
Christopher Gillen
· 1 month ago
Awwww... and we love you too.
Name
· 1 month ago
Hey Amanda, the internet is a frikin fascinating communication device...talk to 30 people at the same time, post things that people will read almost instantly as if they had a lojack on you, express the most deviously unuderstandable things your mind can conjure and still find about a thousand people who will respond to it as if they knew what you were talking about...who knows? maybe we humans will finally be able to develop better usage of our brain because of it. Even though our northern hemisphere will mostly be developed in how to make a faster twitter comment. Nonetheless, I find you fascinating, and the internet keeps me up to date with you once i actually find the time in my procrastination to be perplexed. Good luck with the emails, who knows how many hours of life we've yet to waste trying to stay in touch. I gave up trying to stay in contact with people I do not find particularly interesting... Maybe being more picky would make it an easier task? Anyways, thanks for existing.. your music and expression are essential in my viewing of the world. Best of luck towards future projects, desires and enjoyments.
tim_{d}
· 1 month ago
"this is happening to everybody, it must be."
your network is particularly wide and you are particularly committed to it, but in general, yes yes a thousand times yes, the sea of people i am obligated to converse with (and indeed enjoy conversing with, subject to the panic i feel about not being able to do anything else while conversing with them) is bewildering. i don't know how you manage.
z.ky
· 1 month ago
I love how you are embracing the Internet and thinking of new possibilities, instead of being against it because it's too modern or technological (or virtual?), or something. I am usually asleep when the #LOFNOTC-y magic is happening, but I love catching up on Twitter after I get up! (:
mork
· 1 month ago
practice online would be awesome to see/hear
ElegantRubble
· 1 month ago
I definitely can relate on the not smoking and wanting to move to New York. Unfortunately all the free college I get for being a former foster kid/batshit crazy is paid for by the Commonwealth of Massachusetts. Also, I don't know what a big 'honor' this is but "Astronaut" is now my favorite song....ever. It's kind of a a big deal (to paraphrase Ron Burgundy/Kanye West). I've had a favorite band (No Doubt) but not even a song. So thanks for that. Hopefully I can spend New Years with you and the Pops. <3
garethgraham
· 1 month ago
That e.e.cummings thing made me laugh out loud! :)
Brianne
· 1 month ago
I want to make and wear a shirt that says "e.e. cummings loves capslock" n0w. A lot. And it's sad, because I know I'll never have the money to go make one for myself.
tiny_little_dot
· 1 month ago
existing in a corner of the internet with you is nice.
whenever i read in all caps it sounds more like someone yelling through a crazy windstorm.
dressmate
· 1 month ago
Crazy is good you know...if you didn't do crazy stuff you would be bored. I get 100's of emails everyday... and I use the delete button whenever I can. If you miss Neil come back to the UK in fact .... come and live here we do yoag too you know. I will make costumes for you to wear......... Carol
Dan
· 1 month ago
Hurrah for internet parties! Also, don't leave good ole Boston; Boston is maaahvelous!
EventuallyWeAllStopBleeding
· 1 month ago
This is so genuine and heartfelt. I want to hug you so bad.
Thank you for all the long hours of work you've done for years, all the timeless songs and art you've made, and the endless amounts of smiles and joyful tears of laughter you've given us...
You've made so many peoples lives better because of what you do... as random as it all might be sometimes :)
And we just want to do the same for you
You've made us enjoy our lives moment by moment, We want to make yours enjoyable at every moment. We love you. I love you x
P.S. How about a worldwide Halloween webcast party on the internet/real life party extravaganza? We'll all try webcast/twitpic our own parties simultaneously?
P.P.S. I miss Neil too, his tweets were funny, coy in a gentlemanly way :)
procrastinating
· 1 month ago
RE: your idea for online practice, I've also started doing something similar. In order to come up with a ridiculous montage, I have to practice and select the worst parts, more or less to sing and post them in a vocal vlog to hopefully work myself up for my diploma in musical theatre or something. :)
Don't move to NY, move to Melbourne. Oh wait, it might be a little too far from the glorious NG
buggy_beatle
· 1 month ago
I know this is dumb but.... When I saw the pictures of the Beatles with the Capslock sign, I screamed. You made me a big softie Amanda. :)
lamissv
· 1 month ago
e.e. cummings being mentioned made me really happy.
amandaflintoff
· 1 month ago
We love you too. Big Hugs and beautiful Aussie spring sunshine from: Baby Palmer (4.5 months old) and parents Kim and Amanda Flintoff. xoxoxoxox
Wolven
· 1 month ago
It does happen to everyone. So difficult to let the old ones go, even if they've obviously moved on, long ago. Not to mention, not getting attached to the ones you never really knew, in the first place.
But I'll make you a deal: If you don't smoke, I won't start again.
Alexa
· 1 month ago
The world is a better place simply because you exist. I am not even counting your art, which helps me cope. And trust me, you are talented enough to tackle the symphony. I used to play piano; now I suck. So I know. Be Amanda, okay? That's all you have to do. The world is better for it, and that is a promise.
dave__mac
· 1 month ago
Wow! Quite a Power Blog! T'anks! ^.^
Name
· 1 month ago
<3 Karl that <3's capslock.
derekT
· 1 month ago
You can do anything amanda! You're a fucking Rock Star! Without all the famous shit! BUT A ROCK STAR NONE THELESS!.
p.s.
We miss you talking about neil!
bpnichols
· 1 month ago
You're a hard girl not to like, Ms. Palmer. But e.e. cummings loving caps lock? Sacrilege! SACRILEGE I TELL YOU!!! Next thing you know you'll be having him hating parentheses. CHAOS!!!
Steven
· 1 month ago
Yes, you can play the piano. I've seen ya do it. ;) lol Have fun in China!!! You should do a photoshoot in the Forbidden City, jump the ropes and sit on the emperor's old throne wearing a free Tibet t-shirt. Bjork has your back!!
shakti
· 1 month ago
please come to new york, you're amazing. we're amazing. this is homehomehome.
the concrete jungle wasteland needs some more life injected in it.
Tracy
· 1 month ago
I joined twitter the night of the epic LOFNOTC party. What a way to begin!
You're awesome. Hope to catch a show one day.
I almost typed shoe but I erased it.
isaac
· 1 month ago
"the thing i love most about taking over a little corner of the internet is how totally ephemeral it is.
it never exists again."
until you bring it up again and again. and again and again. it would have been performance art if you left it at one. the very first time. never spoke of it, didn't print shirts, didn't whore it out like a neverending episode of the price is right. but that isn't the new you, is it. somewhere inside you is the artist you were, standing alone, blanketed in white. no one knew your name, no one fucking cared. but you did it anyway and it was great. i'm sure this'll be deleted. peace.
Name
· 1 month ago
screw the beatles. all 4 of them. because none of them ever showed up at SEA TAC to carry your uke!
Come back to Seattle, we miss you. I see all this shit about upcoming tours and the time you spend kickin it with Jason, and I gotta wonder why those two things don't collide more often. I've seen you, and I've seen Jason. I have to believe that together, you're a force of nature!
Or maybe that's the absinthe talking.
I doubt it though, because I'm a KYLE CASSIDY fan first and foremost and he apparently does not care for absinthe.
sqdghst
· 1 month ago
Re<del>al</del>search proposal: LOVELOVELOVE : [we love you!!!]
are you... you are a celebrity? you're having a crisis like me, is it existential? is it postmodern? are we speaking, or am i immediately removed, voluntarily perpetuating the dilution of? (you'll have to excuse me, there was not enough time to read your entire message, i've 300 000 tabs open in one browser and a couple in the next, some articles on Plasma Knives and efforts being made at Stanford University to preserve electronic artifacts such as "online novel 253" and some computer games seem more pressing at the moment - benjamin is breathing down my neck, my professor is holding my hand and i am bemused by something and another)
Let's play - deconstruction!
there are a few memories of people mentioning your name, jason one of them, perhaps muchmore and nicolay... they seem as they may know you. and i come across this blog of yours (isn't tumbling something? i used to say to myself: "Roll and tumble, roll and tumble."
here we have it. the now time. the end time. the future. the collapse of time and space. here i am, there you are. all things incorporated, you're a commodity, i buy, and then you're chopped and screwed, like t-pain, or was it BIG, but i've stewed the cassette tape in reverb for a couple of hours, photographed it and placed it through a complex algorithm thought up by a small division of koons' workforce. then i go back to chewing up popular titles such as: the dictionary; the communist manifesto; alice in wonderland.
i think to myself: why not ask delillo some questions? how about david lynch? perhaps my mother will share her transcendental meditation, ten days of silence in a group of sixty, and i am on how many days shouting in a group smaller, someone larger, indistinguishable, in far and inbetween? i think to myself: i know at least a couple people she does. (but this only comes up when i realize who you are. first i find your recent post through some search-game and then i find out you are that famous person in that famous group. your name precedes you. or, in this case, you precede your name. or, in this case, "you" aren't anything like you think you are, and simply a collection of mentions. and then, an aura, a spectre compiled, a mass of images (each reproduced many one times), and then you are not you ? and we love you!
let's see if anything happens.
Stefan
· 1 month ago
Hey Amanda,
I used to comment regularly and be on the shadowbox and stuff, and we have hung out a few times in the past, but I haven't really been around here for a while.
Anyway, all your talk about feeling obliged to connect with everyone made me kind of sad. You mentioned webcasts and facebook and twitter and myspace and so on, but it all feels very... empty. It IS totally ephemeral, by design. But is that any way to live your life?
Do you remember writing this?
"I do not want to live to archive my own life. I see it everywhere around me, especially with the popularity of web diaries, forums, and cell phones that take pictures. I do not want to fall into the subtle trap of truly believing I Blog Therefore I Am."
You wrote it in your blog, in 2004 I think. It struck a chord with me and I saved it somewhere at the time, and now just reading your post today reminded me of it. I wonder if you still feel that way..?
I hope you're okay.
x
Name
· 1 month ago
my thoughts exactly.
And personally I would rather hear you play the piano than tweet.
jastith
· 1 month ago
First, I love this post and what it represents. Also, I think that sometimes the things we do instead of working are more important that the work we should have been doing in that moment.
Also things I love about this post--e.e. cummings. LOL and the Tegan and Sara shoutout. I'm waiting on that album! :D
Now, for the actual reason I came to your blog today and this is the testament to internet culture and a sense of friendship that exists between celebrities and their fans. And, I know you'll see this someday, even if you don't have time to read it all or follow it, but I'm going to tell it to you how it occurred.
A friend of mine on livejournal, where I do almost all of my blogging, sent me a link to Jay Smooth on youtube. I followed his link to his website at http://www.illdoctrine.com/ which I promptly trolled for information/links/etc and ultimately rss'd. Now, here's where you come in. Jay did a panel on storytelling at The New School. It's an interesting panel talking about media, the internet, storytelling and how we combine and utilize these tools now and what that means.
The third speak is a lady named Nina Paley who made "Sita Sings The Blues" (http://www.sitasingstheblues.com/) which is a retelling of the Indian epic the Ramayana. There's a lot of what she says here that's interesting and compelling and part of that is that she licensed this feature film under a creative commons license and has made the entire thing (including source files) available for download. It's a fascinating thing.
So, she talks about her reasons, about art and the walls built between the audience at the artist by media and how those are being broken down and that there's more a participatory nature to it now. So, I watched the whole panel (over an hour long) and there were things I thought were neat and interesting and things I didn't like, but when she started talking, several of my friends came to mind because this is a conversation that we'd been having. You're not my friend in that way, but you were one of the people I thought of, so here is a link to the panel: http://fora.tv/2009/09/22/Tribeca_at_The_New_Sc...
If I did that right, it will open directly at the point at which she begins speaking, if I'm wrong, scroll down to where there are chapter listings: she's number 18. Her entire discussion as well as the q and a is very interesting and, I think, relevant to your interests. ;)
Have a good one, get some rest and have a safe trip.
Defixiones
· 1 month ago
ASS-CAPSLOCK = WIN
ajekofalltrades
· 1 month ago
I started following your twitterfeed shortly after the first #LOFNOTC. Indeed, it was the first twitterfeed I decided to follow and it felt like the whole world kind of shifted. It was still the same world, but now there was this back room I could go to and just kind of look and watch and see what people were doing - or rather saying, in less than 140 characters.
Slowly, I've added people to follow and I've gotten a few surprise followers on my feed, which is strange and exciting and, honestly, also a little bit of a challenge. Some days, especially when alcohol is involved, it's really easy to just rattle off a bunch of madness and just enjoy the social stream, to be immersed in the random frantic action that is Twitter and not care what you may be broadcasting into the ether. After all, people choose to follow the tweets, so it shouldn't be a surprise when they find out that they're not earth-shatteringly brilliant, profound, or side-splittingly funny, right?
What I am getting at is that I don't know how you do it. How you manage to stay plugged in to the stream and be so engaging and so honest and so human. Even with the relatively small group of people I interact with on Twitter, and my admittedly much smaller email volume, and I some days feel overwhelmed and unable to cope. That you manage to connect with so many people really attests to your character. That you continue to encourage us to be inspired and to create, is magnificent.
Since my initial foray into Twitter and subsequently being swept up in the whirlwind, I've started making some of the best art and music of my life (including a card for the upcoming AFP tarot deck) and making meaningful connections with people whom I've never met, but whom I love nonetheless. I've also watched others be inspired to greatness by your enthusiasm and lust for life. I've personally laughed and cried and created and sung and screamed and raged and flown and floated and read and rioted and written and ripped and loved and lost and lived with an enthusiasm that I thought that I might have lost. "We're given life to find it out" right?
For the inspiration, I say thank you. For your courage, I say thank you. For your love, music, humor, candor, and willingness to connect, we all say thank you.
Love and light to you. jake
p.s. so very looking forward to the road trip from SW Wisconsin to see the New Year's Eve show. It shall be epic.
p.p.s. ee cummings + CAPS LOCK = genuine hilarity.
haleyhanabusa
· 1 month ago
"but now there was this back room I could go to and just kind of look and watch and see what people were doing - or rather saying, in less than 140 characters."
The best way I've heard twitter described. I had originally thought it a silly way of people letting everyone know when they were about to eat lunch, but I never thought of it as what it really is- Probably the largest and most interactive IM program I've ever seen.
"Since my initial foray into Twitter and subsequently being swept up in the whirlwind, I've started making some of the best art and music of my life"
I also feel the same way here. (I'm sure not in the exact same way, but something close.) I'm able to see what various artists I admire are thinking. I made a graphic that Amanda Palmer and other people actually liked. I've never had any kind of confidence in any of my art before, but now I find myself completely thrown into it. I've found the courage to ask my brother to read my stories, to actually continue practising drawing because it doesn't really always "suck". I've been able to listen to and make friends with people I never dreamt of 'meeting', because I've always been afraid to speak to other people-- I don't think that just because it's the internet means it's not "really being social".
Instead of the internet causing me to lose all grip with reality, it's caused me to fall in love with it.
davidgrantrosen
· 1 month ago
i truly empathize. Yes- the internet is soooooooooooo empowering to the artist - but (as you point out- EVEN with a team to help out)- there's just some stuff that only you can do- and that's when it starts to bite into your creative time (oh shit- i should be doing that design revision, editing that video, (PRACTICING PIAno?)calling such-n-such to arrange another session.) I was listening to some writer on NPR last night and she was bitching that once upon a time- creating product was 95% and the (self-generated) marketing-- only 5%. Now it's the other way round. Her publishers expect her to do a certain (read: HUGE) amount of self-promotion, FB, Twattering, Blogs etc. etcethefukncetrahhhhhhh. Of course- something has to give in the face of this awesome opportunity- let's just hope it's not the art (too much of the time). Miss a-- there is a fine line between using the medium smartly versus becoming it's whore. I read a post somewhere in this bunch basically putting you down for doing just this. I strongly disagree with the negative pitch of his pitch- but no doubt...there is always a crevice beckoning- it's lip always a-quiver with Crapitalism and the hollow promise of the abys below. BTW- please take a look at the pics we took of you and the article i wrote and p[ass on your feedback. You know where to find it/ me. P.S. Am MUCH better now! Last scan was clear! yay-upon-yayzzzz. Oh also- EVERYONE just fukn loves the sketch i did of your eyes. You should post it on your site. I'll print them on panties and we can give the proceeds to some kick-ass charity (like maybe for all the stray dogs without homes running around the middle east through the ruins we created with our tax dollr$) i must at least send you one so neal can stare into your eyes when you fall asleep face down! ;p
Ihategroupies
· 1 month ago
amanda, i herewith beg you, i FORCE you to do piano-practice sessions for Youtube!!! Music-tutorial by AFP! We'll profite mutual! You'll have your practice and we can widen our musical skills!
WOW! i am waiting, ...bursting...
from annina, your biggest fan of switzerland!
p.s. tomorrow is my flute lesson...i am fucking tired and my lungs and lips are weak but damn i have to get through the Händel-sonata NOW, hopefully this ends before midnight!
Did you know, that your musical- and performing style is an inspiration to me as a (hobby) FLUTE player? It is!
love, Annina Frey
please visit Germany's best feminist website/forum (run by me!): www.riot-grrrl.de
Ihategroupies
· 1 month ago
amanda, i herewith beg you, i FORCE you to do piano-practice sessions for Youtube!!! Music-tutorial by AFP! We'll profite mutual! You'll have your practice and we can widen our musical skills!
WOW! i am waiting, ...bursting...
from annina, your biggest fan of switzerland!
p.s. tomorrow is my flute lesson...i am fucking tired and my lungs and lips are weak but damn i have to get through the Händel-sonata NOW, hopefully this ends before midnight!
Did you know, that your musical- and performing style is an inspiration to me as a (hobby) FLUTE player? It is!
love, Annina Frey
please visit Germany's best feminist website/forum (run by me!): www.riot-grrrl.de
rhyskka
· 1 month ago
The timezone (+3 gmt) unfortunately makes it less possible for me to join your lofnotc nights. But I usually read the chronics in the morning :) I hope I will catch on with some of the next parties. Why don't you make a lofnotc webcast someday? With piano practicing or requests. Good luck in China!
pingdini
· 1 month ago
e.e. cummings loving caps lock has made my day!
katiacazares
· 1 month ago
My darling Amanda, You give and give and give. and we take, in the form of personal replies to our queries and the opportunity to cook you dinner. The few times you take, you name it as what it is. And some people find it shameful. And still you give.
You, like me, are a Taurus. We need sensuality, we need pleasures and comforts, but most importantly we feel that we need to please and comfort our loved ones. And you have taken us all in as your loved ones. But you cannot please and comfort and heal our souls until you heal your OWN! It is a hard lesson to learn, and even harder to apply. And you are a rockstar who cares, which only compounds your problem. treat yourself like your own lover. be tender. gaze deep into your own eyes. pamper yourself. make love for hours on end. walks on the beach. candlelit dinners.
DON'T FORGET TO BREATHE. (breathing loves CAPSLOCK, too.)
<3 your personal psychic in California
amandalea420
· 1 month ago
I decided..since I'll never be that cool..to go listen to the Smiths.
chanceriley
· 1 month ago
Okay. I'm new to Amanda Palmer, as my friend has just recently mentioned her. She mentioned your love for random things. Now I had ordered a poster of you crowd surfing as a birthday present for aforementioned friend and put my business in as Tim's Butchery Shop and Funeral Home (where our motto is you stab 'em, we slab 'em) and I wondered if you found this little gag amusing or not.
June_Miller
· 1 month ago
Let me begin this with a precursor: I'm really tired, and a bit out of it, so I'm really sorry if anything I write hereafter sucks. I also apologize in advanced.
...
Hi.
You are amazingly busy. Even on your off time, you're still just going at it. We've all kind of noticed this, over the years.
'i want to stay connected with EVERYBODY, but i can’t. i dont’ know how to let anyone or anything go.
this is happening to everybody, it must be.'
It's so true. When shit just piles up on top of you, all at once, it's so easy to lose contact with folks. I barely even get to call people I miss, just because A: I'm too tired, or B: I'm running around doing something over here, over there, and then my head explodes.
Sometimes, Facebook is the only way to keep up on the ones you care about most. How odd..
...
Ha ha, e.e. cummings and caps. Perfect.
True Blue Madonna was by far the hottest. The "Open Your Heart" video? Dude, don't even get me started. Oof.
By the way, does anyone know who that is on the cover of The Queen Is Dead? I know I probably sound lame and some really big Moz fan is more than likely going to rip me a new one, but really, I'd like to know, thanks.
...
Don't smoke, Amanda. It's bad for you. Let me take care of it.
...
That's all we got for now. I'm sorry. Glad things are well, but please don't stress yourself out. You know how to stay grounded when shit gets hectic. You've gotten this far, eh?
Good night.
deutschergluecksklee
· 1 month ago
Wow, China and Singapore?! I can't imagine how awesome that will be- I'm sure it will flood you with much love and inspiration- I hope you find a special way to connect to your meditation there! Please report back when you can, I can't wait to hear about it! And thank you for your insight on artists supporting themselves, you are ever observant and honest, as well as constructive and receptive.
This_Burning_Age
· 1 month ago
Maybe it's just the damnable insomnia (cold night slipped into slate grey day with only ginger wine and a dicky copy of Cubase to take the edge off) but I felt a certain amount of resonance with your post (mmm...synergistic-y...Yeah bollocks...the only energy I'm feeling right now is the imperceptible thud of radiation neutralising my boys from the mobile phone in my pocket).
I live in constant fear of people finding out that I'm "not...a...proper...musician".
Christ on a bike I don't know what I'll do if anyone gets wise to that. I write music, I play instruments, I even have an (entirely self funded) album (hmmm...I also have fuck all money...Watson! I see a pattern forming!)...but I constantly feel like an imposter, or like some glorified sleight of hand merchant, distracting the audience from the rather dull reality with a good line in bluff, bluster and sequins.
The constant, drowning avalanche of Email, Twitter, Myspace correspondence (etc.etc.ad nauseum) also rings a particularly dolorous bell. It sometimes seems as if it's all that makes me, me. When did I start being defined by these electronic missives? When did that happen? Sweet Jesus and All the Little Orphans it's fucking insiduous. Like the old frog in boiling water-thing...put a frog in boiling water and it leaps to safety...put it in cold water and slowly bring it to the boil and Mr Frog will lie back and take it till he's ready to be served with a selection of greens and a knob of garlic butter. And while I'm mucking out the Augean Stables of my Inbox I find I haven't picked up a guitar in days. Without dredging up the whole "state of the recording industry" debacle, as an Unsigned, pretty much unknown artist/band it's doubly worse as there's No Escape (thought that just about warranted a pair of Capitals)...you have to be a musician, an arranger, a writer, an engineer, a producer, a spokesperson, a manager, a graphic designer, a photographer, an IT guru, a publicist, a distributor, a shop owner and a multitude of other things...and here's the kicker...ALL at the same time.
And it's roughly at this point that, if you're anything like me, you feel like you're drowning under dark waters wondering how the hell you're going to carry on, let alone write another song. If the compulsion (addiction?) to write and to play wasn't so much stronger (coupled with an acute sense of time slipping quickly away, brought about by certain physical ailments) I'd have disappeared into the murky depths long ago.
Sorry for the rambling post. Just wanted to reply. Christ on a bike I hope I was coherent because I'm too fucking tired to re-read or re-write that! I don't read that many Blogs but yours I often do. Less bullshit, more directness, something I actually have chance to relate to. So cheers Amanda, and, as I've got inked down my arm as a constant reminder...Perseverantia. It's all any of us can do I guess.
Friday of "This Burning Age".
cycholibrarian
· 1 month ago
Hang in there dude. The Tschaikovsky will rock, because hell, it was the rock of it's day. And that concerto does fucking rock.
melodyinheresy
· 1 month ago
i loved e.e.cummings back in my high school days you are so goddamn witty it is impossible to do anything but love you your wit being one of many beautiful attributes you possess this should come as no surprise
thank you as always
anna
· 1 month ago
Paperwork kinda sucks when you're an artist. The connection part is awesome. The knowing people get it, that they care about you and the art. But it's a giant time-suck, and the phone is not much better. I guess we're all trying to make up for the fact that we can't just run out and see each other when we need to. Anyway, just.. yes. I have this problem too. The paperwork makes the money which makes the art. It also keeps you connected to the people you love.
Maybe with the piano thing, tape yourself, and if you suck, then don't share. If you like it, share. Maybe go into it thinking you are going to make it a post? I don't know. I am super poor right now, trying to figure out if it's all worth it, so the least I can do in lieu of buying a CD is send some love and random stranger-advice. Peace.
Deadstar2004
· 1 month ago
We all miss Neil. We also all Love you.
But like Penny Lane says, if you ever get lonely, all you gotta do is visit your friends at the record store, cept now they're all on twitter too.
Katie
· 1 month ago
I would say I'd like to be you when I grow up, but as I'm 25, I think I've missed that opportunity.
So let's just say I believe in you.
Gemmstarr
· 1 month ago
Do enjoy the weather in Sinking Island of Singapore, Amanda. Too bad I am going to miss you and Neil in Singapore. Then again, I have met Neil the last time he was in Singapore. I never thought you will be performing here but you are!! Alas, I'll be in Brooklyn. :((
robert vaughn
· 1 month ago
"i want to stay connected with EVERYBODY, but i can’t. i dont’ know how to let anyone or anything go."
"this is happening to everybody, it must be."
truer words may have never been spoken
S
· 1 month ago
we're cowboys... we get to make it up. we'll probably live through it. Nobody really remembers the sleeping in the rain part of cowboyness. or sockless boots. or piranhas. well... maybe not the piranhas. shakespeare up, cowgirl :)
Hannah
· 1 month ago
Amanda, that is so awesome you are tackling the Tchaikovsky concerto. Good luck to you, it will be an amazing experience.
Hannah
· 1 month ago
Amanda, that is so awesome you are tackling the Tchaikovsky concerto. Good luck to you, it will be an amazing experience.
Lubear
· 1 month ago
there are few people i would drop everything to see perform, and you are one of them.
Amberbree MinnieModern
· 1 month ago
Awww and of course Neil misses you. All of this is exciting and entertaining... I have been watching my aunt, then my mum, then my other aunt, now my inlaws take part in FB. It's crazy! If my gran were still alive -she would be there, too.
You're an artist and a performer -and a good person with too much on her plate. And yet, you keep eating. you're not insulting any of the cooks. bravo!
You have me scared of Boston now. The husband had his first interview with a company there. We are desperate though. With my illness and his being self-employed since February -the economy is taxing and we have to go where-ever a full time job promises. It stinks because my 'rents just bought a condo to be closer in my worst boughts. The normally live in La Jolla -at their house. And now what, irony. May be moving. He passed up Tiffany's in NY. We're regretting that now. We thought it would be hard to survive financially -like Boston. But this company is offering good compensation.
Go where ever you think you will be happy -and I am sure you will have plenty of twitter helpers to move you.
Gosh, and again -you and neil are so kind and not big headed. Thank you for making this past Summer one of the best for our dot Catra and my Aussie friend, Fuji.
Xenjn
· 1 month ago
We love you too, AFP! ^__^ And yes, DO IT. Webcast your piano rehearsals and such. Trust me, I know what it's like. I need friends to kick my ass to get me to do ANYTHING sometimes. ...So let your 100,000 followers on twitter kick your ass for you! ...That sounded completely fucked up...XD
I live most of my life on the internet, but I rarely feel that overwhelming 'plugged in' feeling you do...Maybe it's because most of my social life is on the internet.
Maybe it's because I force myself awake at 4am just so I can go on a bike ride, go on the swings at the local park and spend 2 to 3 hours blasting music, in the dark, loving nature, and letting my mind flourish.
I think your problem is that you're looking at this from a pessimistic view. There's nothing wrong with 'plugging in' treat it as something positive, don't stare at the screen as you're twittering away thinking 'fuck, I should be outside, I should be...'
It's not as bad as you think, you honestly seem to be able to balance the internet from the outside world. And though it may feel like a complete and utter jumbled mess, that's just the way you get stuff done, AFP!
Honestly I'd be really afraid for you if you were suddenly, magically able to organize your time properly and be able to do everything without tripping, or making a mess of the world and of yourself. If you could do that, you wouldn't be HUMAN. You wouldn't be AFP.
Being HUMAN means plugging into things, before they had the internet it meant plugging into a Nintendo system, before that it meant plugging into a record player, before that? A TV, a Radio!
We all naturally plug into things, electronic or not. And there's nothing wrong with it, it makes us real, it makes us human. Obsessions and objects we can't live without. All of that shit started thousands of years ago, fuck, how do you think RELIGION has survived this fucking long?
So plug into your happy MAC, AFP. Plug in without guilt, without hate. Because regardless if you believe it or not, you seem to balance the world and the world inside the screen much better then you think. The crazy is what makes you, YOU. It's what makes your life work, what makes OUR lives work, and it's what makes staying your fan work soooo well.
We got alot of love for you, AFP. If I hadn't connected to you though this screen, this 'PLUG' then I don't think I'd love you this deeply.
...Though, I draw the line at robots. ~Xenjn
R
· 1 month ago
hope i see you next year....
Kristen McHugh
· 1 month ago
LOFNOTC WAS AWESOME. :D All the photos made me think of flip-book animation, actually. ( If I could draw to save my life, I'd totally make an AFP flip-book.) Since you've been mentioning the yoga/meditation thing, I thought I'd share this: http://www.ashesandsnow.org/en/flash-popup.php#... A friend passed it on, (@lifemapper) and in the midst of 2 wks of non-stop pressure, it really brought me back to a place I could breathe. I hope you have a wonderful time in China/Singapore.
Lucy
· 1 month ago
San Francisco feels like a kitchen. Kinda. You could move here. Be By the Beautiful Bay! It never snows in coastal California.
Dea
· 1 month ago
Hi Amanda,
As someone also seeking small pockets of sanity in a hectic life, could I ask you to share your meditation technique with us? My thought process re: meditation goes like this: "Meditation sounds cool! I'd like to try that! Also sounds buddhist. Very venerable, ages-old. Maybe I should take a course. Because I want to learn how to do it Properly. Where can I take a course? When do I have the time to take a course? " and on and on and on
So anything you have to say on it would be, er, enlightening :)
thanks.
Tea/like the old lady beverage
· 1 month ago
Amanda, please don't work too hard.
but Tchaikovsky 1st is amazing.
Anthony
· 1 month ago
Dear Amanda,
That sounds weird. I'm sure I could find a better place to put this comment but this blog post is recent and I got shit to say.
Essentially you've changed my life. Not just in the way I love music, but in the way I see the world. You've helped me realize that there are good people in the world, including yourself. I had more i was going to say here but I didn't really know how to present it in a proper way.
Anyway, after a serious bought of depression I recently I started doing things again. Visiting friends, and going interesting places, and meeting nice people. My goal was to go to the show you are playing in Falls Church next month, but being a minor I sorta can't. It would have been only my second concert anyway(First was Kimya Dawson if you're wondering), so I dunno if I'd fit in very well.
Other goal: Boston Symphony Hall show. I've never been farther north than Baltimore, but I've gone farther South for weirder reasons. If I can actually find the money to buy a ticket before it sells out, I might be able to go. I must be interested to have a gourmet -boxed- dinner. That sorta ruins the purpose doesn't it? :P
I love you Amanda, In all ways. I hope we'll get to meet oneday, one way or another.
Best Wishes, Anthony.
p.s. This comment will probably be relatively poor written and difficult to read, since I'm not good at writing little things like this.
Anthony
· 1 month ago
Ooh fuck, that last sentence before the p.s. sounded creepy.
p.p.s I'm not a stalker, Amanda. I promise :D
Steven
· 1 month ago
cue up; Blondie's - One Way or Another
luciendesar
· 1 month ago
"who am i kidding…? i hate playing the piano alone. this has always been my problem. it took me years to understand it.i hate practicing. i hate playing with no witnesses. "
Holy shit! this is the same issue with me! I didn't realize it after playing piano for 25 years I really have an issue playing alone or not within ear shot of people. I have this "what is the point?" feeling every time I rehearse. Composing is different because you get in that creative zone that your hair could catch fire and you could care less. But practicing the piano is different.. it needs to be done though. My advice, I did this when I lived in NY working for a Broadway company, is to practice at nursing homes. They enjoy it and they don't care if you are repetitive when you play.
ExistentialGirl
· 1 month ago
I thoroughly love your music, and it has been both incendiary in my life and a solace in the many times of sorrow. What's even more interesting and wonderful and mysterious (or maybe just genetics...) is that as I have morphed through my life, I have found that your music has followed similar paths, and remained relevant to how I perceive consciousness. I find it wonderfully delicious that there is the opportunity to communicate like this...
It's ironic that you express hesitations at not being classical player, because for me it is just the opposite. I was trained classically from an early age, and became reasonably accomplished, but after abandoning that for adolescent adventure and excess, I find that now when I sit at a piano, though I have the urge to let loose and play something, it's hopeless. I literally cannot play a note...I just freeze. I envy and enjoy the way you play with such true passion, born not from endless hours of wrist-slapping, but from raw emotion.
I am a new mother, and though this is entirely different than touring, I understand how it is to have something you created and that you love entirely, something that is a part of yourself, be the same thing that can rob a bit of your personal freedom, and how exhausting it can be. Now that's it's a little more difficult to find moments to myself, I always keep in mind that this is my existence, I can make it whatever I want, and I am responsible for what it is...and I love ever moment of it.
Have fun, make music, make art, make love....do what you can with the absurdity of it all to make existence a bit less painful.
Oh, and I am not one for keeping posted on things of this nature, but I heard you were dating Neil Gaiman, and that seriously has put a smile on my face for the day. I have been reading everything he has ever published since I was a teenager, and his writing, very much like your music, was able to take me out of my head and provide much comfort in my life. I can't wait to get a copy of the book you two did together, and I expect much more!
My little artist family here, we're all going to send you some artwork and stuff...I hope we can make you smile, too. (I hope you get it, actually...)
Much affection, Courtney
Amee Zing
· 1 month ago
Darling, I am proud of you. You are brave, and thank YOU (capslock) for accepting the challange. I hope that someday, we can meet. You do inspire me to continue to write my script. An admirer of your genius, Amee no need to reply, I really get it.
All Comments
The #LOFNOTC was seriously the best time I've had in a while and I cannot wait for Friday to come for a little more of that action xD I have a halloween costume to finish that evening, but I'm sure I can make it all work...
I'm sorry you're stressed and away from the music. The emails must be slightly devastating, though exciting in a way. You are getting to see everyone else's stories and fun, seeing parts of lives that you'd never see otherwise.
I understand the meta-narcissism. I'm similar with my dancing. SO PRACTICE FOR US! ;D You'll enjoy it in the end and it's more exciting for us to follow the ENTIRE PROCESS versus just seeing the end product. It's a whole lot more awesome out of one person and piece of music.
SO as always, warmest wishes. We love you :]
Greta.
I just read this to my boyfriend because I thought it was FUCKING GENIUS, in a small and perfect way. You have to have the kitchen. Not just for the coffee and the wineglasses and whatever food you feel like that day — cheap burritos or a giant feast or whatEVER – but because kitchens are the unsung places where things Happen. (That Lemonheads song is so true.) At parties, the best people wind up in the kitchen. Ideas spring forth from countertops, I swear.
im sorry you miss neil & im sorry you have so many motherfucking emails.
move to NY, because i plan on living there when im older.
i love you
you're coolness makes all the peeps happy. the new years show will slay; no worries, dearest.
and being from the tri-state, I happily endorse your move to nyc. just saying (we aren't as cold and have better bagels).
love and awesomexx
lilly lionised
Oh, and how does one manage to put separate pictures together in order to make a mega-mosaic picture? (Like you did with the four Beatles photos?)
I've always wondered ... and am hoping I don't need to own some fancy software, like Photoshop, LoL ... :P
DID I MENTION I LOVE AMANDA?!
PS. Amanda, thank you for being awesome. I hope you come to Perth Australia again so I can see you perform in person, unlike last time. Please tell Neil that Alice the PhD student he spoke to at Worldcon says hi. xx
that way, you can tackle one subject matter at a time and it might make it feel like less a chore (or ignore subject matter easily)
xoxox
katie
#lofnotc is pretty special. It's nice to not feel so alone, and trending as quickly as it did was really amazing. Thanks for always keeping the party going.
Best of luck tonight, and thank you for always doing something fresh, amazing, and special. Love you too. =)
I did, however, catch the end of it while it was still trending. I must say, it's amazing the community you've managed to create with #LOFNOTC. Becase of it, I've met a number of interesting, talented, and amazing people. People that make the world a little less lonely. Parties on the internet are awesome (especially since you don't have to worry about what you're gonna wear or if the music's gonna suck or not) and I can't wait to see where you take it now. Viva #LOFNOTC!
your network is particularly wide and you are particularly committed to it, but in general, yes yes a thousand times yes, the sea of people i am obligated to converse with (and indeed enjoy conversing with, subject to the panic i feel about not being able to do anything else while conversing with them) is bewildering. i don't know how you manage.
http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1170/1390961334_...
whenever i read in all caps it sounds more like someone yelling through a crazy windstorm.
If you miss Neil come back to the UK in fact .... come and live here we do yoag too you know.
I will make costumes for you to wear.........
Carol
Also, don't leave good ole Boston; Boston is maaahvelous!
Thank you for all the long hours of work you've done for years, all the timeless songs and art you've made, and the endless amounts of smiles and joyful tears of laughter you've given us...
You've made so many peoples lives better because of what you do... as random as it all might be sometimes :)
And we just want to do the same for you
You've made us enjoy our lives moment by moment,
We want to make yours enjoyable at every moment.
We love you.
I love you x
P.S. How about a worldwide Halloween webcast party on the internet/real life party extravaganza? We'll all try webcast/twitpic our own parties simultaneously?
P.P.S. I miss Neil too, his tweets were funny, coy in a gentlemanly way :)
It's actually working for me so far... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mr7ebTDjo28 Not such a bad idea...
When I saw the pictures of the Beatles with the Capslock sign, I screamed.
You made me a big softie Amanda.
:)
Big Hugs and beautiful Aussie spring sunshine from:
Baby Palmer (4.5 months old) and parents Kim and Amanda Flintoff.
xoxoxoxox
But I'll make you a deal: If you don't smoke, I won't start again.
Be Amanda, okay? That's all you have to do. The world is better for it, and that is a promise.
Quite a Power Blog!
T'anks!
^.^
p.s.
We miss you talking about neil!
the concrete jungle wasteland needs some more life injected in it.
You're awesome. Hope to catch a show one day.
I almost typed shoe but I erased it.
it never exists again."
until you bring it up again and again. and again and again. it would have been performance art if you left it at one. the very first time. never spoke of it, didn't print shirts, didn't whore it out like a neverending episode of the price is right. but that isn't the new you, is it. somewhere inside you is the artist you were, standing alone, blanketed in white. no one knew your name, no one fucking cared. but you did it anyway and it was great. i'm sure this'll be deleted. peace.
Come back to Seattle, we miss you. I see all this shit about upcoming tours and the time you spend kickin it with Jason, and I gotta wonder why those two things don't collide more often. I've seen you, and I've seen Jason. I have to believe that together, you're a force of nature!
Or maybe that's the absinthe talking.
I doubt it though, because I'm a KYLE CASSIDY fan first and foremost and he apparently does not care for absinthe.
are you... you are a celebrity? you're having a crisis like me, is it existential? is it postmodern? are we speaking, or am i immediately removed, voluntarily perpetuating the dilution of?
(you'll have to excuse me, there was not enough time to read your entire message, i've 300 000 tabs open in one browser and a couple in the next, some articles on Plasma Knives and efforts being made at Stanford University to preserve electronic artifacts such as "online novel 253" and some computer games seem more pressing at the moment - benjamin is breathing down my neck, my professor is holding my hand and i am bemused by something and another)
Let's play - deconstruction!
there are a few memories of people mentioning your name, jason one of them, perhaps muchmore and nicolay... they seem as they may know you. and i come across this blog of yours (isn't tumbling something? i used to say to myself: "Roll and tumble, roll and tumble."
here we have it. the now time. the end time. the future. the collapse of time and space. here i am, there you are. all things incorporated, you're a commodity, i buy, and then you're chopped and screwed, like t-pain, or was it BIG, but i've stewed the cassette tape in reverb for a couple of hours, photographed it and placed it through a complex algorithm thought up by a small division of koons' workforce. then i go back to chewing up popular titles such as: the dictionary; the communist manifesto; alice in wonderland.
i think to myself: why not ask delillo some questions? how about david lynch? perhaps my mother will share her transcendental meditation, ten days of silence in a group of sixty, and i am on how many days shouting in a group smaller, someone larger, indistinguishable, in far and inbetween?
i think to myself: i know at least a couple people she does. (but this only comes up when i realize who you are. first i find your recent post through some search-game and then i find out you are that famous person in that famous group. your name precedes you. or, in this case, you precede your name. or, in this case, "you" aren't anything like you think you are, and simply a collection of mentions. and then, an aura, a spectre compiled, a mass of images (each reproduced many one times), and then you are not you ? and we love you!
let's see if anything happens.
I used to comment regularly and be on the shadowbox and stuff, and we have hung out a few times in the past, but I haven't really been around here for a while.
Anyway, all your talk about feeling obliged to connect with everyone made me kind of sad. You mentioned webcasts and facebook and twitter and myspace and so on, but it all feels very... empty. It IS totally ephemeral, by design. But is that any way to live your life?
Do you remember writing this?
"I do not want to live to archive my own life. I see it everywhere around me, especially with the popularity of web diaries, forums, and cell phones that take pictures. I do not want to fall into the subtle trap of truly believing I Blog Therefore I Am."
You wrote it in your blog, in 2004 I think. It struck a chord with me and I saved it somewhere at the time, and now just reading your post today reminded me of it. I wonder if you still feel that way..?
I hope you're okay.
x
And personally I would rather hear you play the piano than tweet.
Also things I love about this post--e.e. cummings. LOL and the Tegan and Sara shoutout. I'm waiting on that album! :D
Now, for the actual reason I came to your blog today and this is the testament to internet culture and a sense of friendship that exists between celebrities and their fans. And, I know you'll see this someday, even if you don't have time to read it all or follow it, but I'm going to tell it to you how it occurred.
A friend of mine on livejournal, where I do almost all of my blogging, sent me a link to Jay Smooth on youtube. I followed his link to his website at http://www.illdoctrine.com/ which I promptly trolled for information/links/etc and ultimately rss'd. Now, here's where you come in. Jay did a panel on storytelling at The New School. It's an interesting panel talking about media, the internet, storytelling and how we combine and utilize these tools now and what that means.
The third speak is a lady named Nina Paley who made "Sita Sings The Blues" (http://www.sitasingstheblues.com/) which is a retelling of the Indian epic the Ramayana. There's a lot of what she says here that's interesting and compelling and part of that is that she licensed this feature film under a creative commons license and has made the entire thing (including source files) available for download. It's a fascinating thing.
So, she talks about her reasons, about art and the walls built between the audience at the artist by media and how those are being broken down and that there's more a participatory nature to it now. So, I watched the whole panel (over an hour long) and there were things I thought were neat and interesting and things I didn't like, but when she started talking, several of my friends came to mind because this is a conversation that we'd been having. You're not my friend in that way, but you were one of the people I thought of, so here is a link to the panel: http://fora.tv/2009/09/22/Tribeca_at_The_New_Sc...
If I did that right, it will open directly at the point at which she begins speaking, if I'm wrong, scroll down to where there are chapter listings: she's number 18. Her entire discussion as well as the q and a is very interesting and, I think, relevant to your interests. ;)
Have a good one, get some rest and have a safe trip.
Slowly, I've added people to follow and I've gotten a few surprise followers on my feed, which is strange and exciting and, honestly, also a little bit of a challenge. Some days, especially when alcohol is involved, it's really easy to just rattle off a bunch of madness and just enjoy the social stream, to be immersed in the random frantic action that is Twitter and not care what you may be broadcasting into the ether. After all, people choose to follow the tweets, so it shouldn't be a surprise when they find out that they're not earth-shatteringly brilliant, profound, or side-splittingly funny, right?
What I am getting at is that I don't know how you do it. How you manage to stay plugged in to the stream and be so engaging and so honest and so human. Even with the relatively small group of people I interact with on Twitter, and my admittedly much smaller email volume, and I some days feel overwhelmed and unable to cope. That you manage to connect with so many people really attests to your character. That you continue to encourage us to be inspired and to create, is magnificent.
Since my initial foray into Twitter and subsequently being swept up in the whirlwind, I've started making some of the best art and music of my life (including a card for the upcoming AFP tarot deck) and making meaningful connections with people whom I've never met, but whom I love nonetheless. I've also watched others be inspired to greatness by your enthusiasm and lust for life. I've personally laughed and cried and created and sung and screamed and raged and flown and floated and read and rioted and written and ripped and loved and lost and lived with an enthusiasm that I thought that I might have lost. "We're given life to find it out" right?
For the inspiration, I say thank you. For your courage, I say thank you. For your love, music, humor, candor, and willingness to connect, we all say thank you.
Love and light to you.
jake
p.s. so very looking forward to the road trip from SW Wisconsin to see the New Year's Eve show. It shall be epic.
p.p.s. ee cummings + CAPS LOCK = genuine hilarity.
The best way I've heard twitter described. I had originally thought it a silly way of people letting everyone know when they were about to eat lunch, but I never thought of it as what it really is- Probably the largest and most interactive IM program I've ever seen.
"Since my initial foray into Twitter and subsequently being swept up in the whirlwind, I've started making some of the best art and music of my life"
I also feel the same way here. (I'm sure not in the exact same way, but something close.) I'm able to see what various artists I admire are thinking. I made a graphic that Amanda Palmer and other people actually liked. I've never had any kind of confidence in any of my art before, but now I find myself completely thrown into it. I've found the courage to ask my brother to read my stories, to actually continue practising drawing because it doesn't really always "suck". I've been able to listen to and make friends with people I never dreamt of 'meeting', because I've always been afraid to speak to other people-- I don't think that just because it's the internet means it's not "really being social".
Instead of the internet causing me to lose all grip with reality, it's caused me to fall in love with it.
WOW! i am waiting, ...bursting...
from annina, your biggest fan of switzerland!
p.s. tomorrow is my flute lesson...i am fucking tired and my lungs and lips are weak but damn i have to get through the Händel-sonata NOW, hopefully this ends before midnight!
Did you know, that your musical- and performing style is an inspiration to me as a (hobby) FLUTE player? It is!
love,
Annina Frey
please visit Germany's best feminist website/forum (run by me!):
www.riot-grrrl.de
WOW! i am waiting, ...bursting...
from annina, your biggest fan of switzerland!
p.s. tomorrow is my flute lesson...i am fucking tired and my lungs and lips are weak but damn i have to get through the Händel-sonata NOW, hopefully this ends before midnight!
Did you know, that your musical- and performing style is an inspiration to me as a (hobby) FLUTE player? It is!
love,
Annina Frey
please visit Germany's best feminist website/forum (run by me!):
www.riot-grrrl.de
Good luck in China!
You give and give and give. and we take, in the form of personal replies to our queries and the opportunity to cook you dinner.
The few times you take, you name it as what it is. And some people find it shameful.
And still you give.
You, like me, are a Taurus. We need sensuality, we need pleasures and comforts, but most importantly we feel that we need to please and comfort our loved ones. And you have taken us all in as your loved ones. But you cannot please and comfort and heal our souls until you heal your OWN! It is a hard lesson to learn, and even harder to apply. And you are a rockstar who cares, which only compounds your problem. treat yourself like your own lover. be tender. gaze deep into your own eyes. pamper yourself. make love for hours on end. walks on the beach. candlelit dinners.
DON'T FORGET TO BREATHE. (breathing loves CAPSLOCK, too.)
<3 your personal psychic in California
She mentioned your love for random things. Now I had ordered a poster of you crowd surfing as a birthday present for aforementioned friend and put my business in as Tim's Butchery Shop and Funeral Home (where our motto is you stab 'em, we slab 'em) and I wondered if you found this little gag amusing or not.
...
Hi.
You are amazingly busy. Even on your off time, you're still just going at it. We've all kind of noticed this, over the years.
'i want to stay connected with EVERYBODY, but i can’t. i dont’ know how to let anyone or anything go.
this is happening to everybody, it must be.'
It's so true. When shit just piles up on top of you, all at once, it's so easy to lose contact with folks. I barely even get to call people I miss, just because A: I'm too tired, or B: I'm running around doing something over here, over there, and then my head explodes.
Sometimes, Facebook is the only way to keep up on the ones you care about most. How odd..
...
Ha ha, e.e. cummings and caps. Perfect.
True Blue Madonna was by far the hottest. The "Open Your Heart" video? Dude, don't even get me started. Oof.
By the way, does anyone know who that is on the cover of The Queen Is Dead? I know I probably sound lame and some really big Moz fan is more than likely going to rip me a new one, but really, I'd like to know, thanks.
...
Don't smoke, Amanda. It's bad for you. Let me take care of it.
...
That's all we got for now. I'm sorry. Glad things are well, but please don't stress yourself out. You know how to stay grounded when shit gets hectic. You've gotten this far, eh?
Good night.
Please report back when you can, I can't wait to hear about it!
And thank you for your insight on artists supporting themselves, you are ever observant and honest, as well as constructive and receptive.
I live in constant fear of people finding out that I'm "not...a...proper...musician".
Christ on a bike I don't know what I'll do if anyone gets wise to that. I write music, I play instruments, I even have an (entirely self funded) album (hmmm...I also have fuck all money...Watson! I see a pattern forming!)...but I constantly feel like an imposter, or like some glorified sleight of hand merchant, distracting the audience from the rather dull reality with a good line in bluff, bluster and sequins.
The constant, drowning avalanche of Email, Twitter, Myspace correspondence (etc.etc.ad nauseum) also rings a particularly dolorous bell. It sometimes seems as if it's all that makes me, me. When did I start being defined by these electronic missives? When did that happen? Sweet Jesus and All the Little Orphans it's fucking insiduous. Like the old frog in boiling water-thing...put a frog in boiling water and it leaps to safety...put it in cold water and slowly bring it to the boil and Mr Frog will lie back and take it till he's ready to be served with a selection of greens and a knob of garlic butter. And while I'm mucking out the Augean Stables of my Inbox I find I haven't picked up a guitar in days. Without dredging up the whole "state of the recording industry" debacle, as an Unsigned, pretty much unknown artist/band it's doubly worse as there's No Escape (thought that just about warranted a pair of Capitals)...you have to be a musician, an arranger, a writer, an engineer, a producer, a spokesperson, a manager, a graphic designer, a photographer, an IT guru, a publicist, a distributor, a shop owner and a multitude of other things...and here's the kicker...ALL at the same time.
And it's roughly at this point that, if you're anything like me, you feel like you're drowning under dark waters wondering how the hell you're going to carry on, let alone write another song. If the compulsion (addiction?) to write and to play wasn't so much stronger (coupled with an acute sense of time slipping quickly away, brought about by certain physical ailments) I'd have disappeared into the murky depths long ago.
Sorry for the rambling post. Just wanted to reply. Christ on a bike I hope I was coherent because I'm too fucking tired to re-read or re-write that! I don't read that many Blogs but yours I often do. Less bullshit, more directness, something I actually have chance to relate to. So cheers Amanda, and, as I've got inked down my arm as a constant reminder...Perseverantia. It's all any of us can do I guess.
Friday of "This Burning Age".
you are so goddamn witty it is impossible to do anything but love you
your wit being one of many beautiful attributes you possess
this should come as no surprise
thank you
as always
Maybe with the piano thing, tape yourself, and if you suck, then don't share. If you like it, share. Maybe go into it thinking you are going to make it a post? I don't know. I am super poor right now, trying to figure out if it's all worth it, so the least I can do in lieu of buying a CD is send some love and random stranger-advice. Peace.
But like Penny Lane says, if you ever get lonely, all you gotta do is visit your friends at the record store, cept now they're all on twitter too.
So let's just say I believe in you.
"this is happening to everybody, it must be."
truer words may have never been spoken
Nobody really remembers the sleeping in the rain part of cowboyness. or sockless boots. or piranhas. well... maybe not the piranhas.
shakespeare up, cowgirl :)
You're an artist and a performer -and a good person with too much on her plate. And yet, you keep eating. you're not insulting any of the cooks. bravo!
You have me scared of Boston now. The husband had his first interview with a company there. We are desperate though. With my illness and his being self-employed since February -the economy is taxing and we have to go where-ever a full time job promises. It stinks because my 'rents just bought a condo to be closer in my worst boughts. The normally live in La Jolla -at their house. And now what, irony. May be moving. He passed up Tiffany's in NY. We're regretting that now. We thought it would be hard to survive financially -like Boston. But this company is offering good compensation.
Go where ever you think you will be happy -and I am sure you will have plenty of twitter helpers to move you.
Gosh, and again -you and neil are so kind and not big headed. Thank you for making this past Summer one of the best for our dot Catra and my Aussie friend, Fuji.
I live most of my life on the internet, but I rarely feel that overwhelming 'plugged in' feeling you do...Maybe it's because most of my social life is on the internet.
Maybe it's because I force myself awake at 4am just so I can go on a bike ride, go on the swings at the local park and spend 2 to 3 hours blasting music, in the dark, loving nature, and letting my mind flourish.
I think your problem is that you're looking at this from a pessimistic view. There's nothing wrong with 'plugging in' treat it as something positive, don't stare at the screen as you're twittering away thinking 'fuck, I should be outside, I should be...'
It's not as bad as you think, you honestly seem to be able to balance the internet from the outside world. And though it may feel like a complete and utter jumbled mess, that's just the way you get stuff done, AFP!
Honestly I'd be really afraid for you if you were suddenly, magically able to organize your time properly and be able to do everything without tripping, or making a mess of the world and of yourself. If you could do that, you wouldn't be HUMAN. You wouldn't be AFP.
Being HUMAN means plugging into things, before they had the internet it meant plugging into a Nintendo system, before that it meant plugging into a record player, before that? A TV, a Radio!
We all naturally plug into things, electronic or not. And there's nothing wrong with it, it makes us real, it makes us human. Obsessions and objects we can't live without. All of that shit started thousands of years ago, fuck, how do you think RELIGION has survived this fucking long?
So plug into your happy MAC, AFP. Plug in without guilt, without hate. Because regardless if you believe it or not, you seem to balance the world and the world inside the screen much better then you think. The crazy is what makes you, YOU. It's what makes your life work, what makes OUR lives work, and it's what makes staying your fan work soooo well.
We got alot of love for you, AFP. If I hadn't connected to you though this screen, this 'PLUG' then I don't think I'd love you this deeply.
...Though, I draw the line at robots.
~Xenjn
Kinda.
You could move here.
Be By the Beautiful Bay! It never snows in coastal California.
As someone also seeking small pockets of sanity in a hectic life, could I ask you to share your meditation technique with us? My thought process re: meditation goes like this: "Meditation sounds cool! I'd like to try that! Also sounds buddhist. Very venerable, ages-old. Maybe I should take a course. Because I want to learn how to do it Properly. Where can I take a course? When do I have the time to take a course? " and on and on and on
So anything you have to say on it would be, er, enlightening :)
thanks.
please don't work too hard.
but Tchaikovsky 1st is amazing.
That sounds weird. I'm sure I could find a better place to put this comment but this blog post is recent and I got shit to say.
Essentially you've changed my life. Not just in the way I love music, but in the way I see the world. You've helped me realize that there are good people in the world, including yourself. I had more i was going to say here but I didn't really know how to present it in a proper way.
Anyway, after a serious bought of depression I recently I started doing things again. Visiting friends, and going interesting places, and meeting nice people. My goal was to go to the show you are playing in Falls Church next month, but being a minor I sorta can't. It would have been only my second concert anyway(First was Kimya Dawson if you're wondering), so I dunno if I'd fit in very well.
Other goal: Boston Symphony Hall show. I've never been farther north than Baltimore, but I've gone farther South for weirder reasons. If I can actually find the money to buy a ticket before it sells out, I might be able to go. I must be interested to have a gourmet -boxed- dinner. That sorta ruins the purpose doesn't it? :P
I love you Amanda, In all ways. I hope we'll get to meet oneday, one way or another.
Best Wishes,
Anthony.
p.s.
This comment will probably be relatively poor written and difficult to read, since I'm not good at writing little things like this.
p.p.s
I'm not a stalker, Amanda. I promise :D
Holy shit! this is the same issue with me! I didn't realize it after playing piano for 25 years I really have an issue playing alone or not within ear shot of people. I have this "what is the point?" feeling every time I rehearse. Composing is different because you get in that creative zone that your hair could catch fire and you could care less. But practicing the piano is different.. it needs to be done though. My advice, I did this when I lived in NY working for a Broadway company, is to practice at nursing homes. They enjoy it and they don't care if you are repetitive when you play.
It's ironic that you express hesitations at not being classical player, because for me it is just the opposite. I was trained classically from an early age, and became reasonably accomplished, but after abandoning that for adolescent adventure and excess, I find that now when I sit at a piano, though I have the urge to let loose and play something, it's hopeless. I literally cannot play a note...I just freeze. I envy and enjoy the way you play with such true passion, born not from endless hours of wrist-slapping, but from raw emotion.
I am a new mother, and though this is entirely different than touring, I understand how it is to have something you created and that you love entirely, something that is a part of yourself, be the same thing that can rob a bit of your personal freedom, and how exhausting it can be. Now that's it's a little more difficult to find moments to myself, I always keep in mind that this is my existence, I can make it whatever I want, and I am responsible for what it is...and I love ever moment of it.
Have fun, make music, make art, make love....do what you can with the absurdity of it all to make existence a bit less painful.
Oh, and I am not one for keeping posted on things of this nature, but I heard you were dating Neil Gaiman, and that seriously has put a smile on my face for the day. I have been reading everything he has ever published since I was a teenager, and his writing, very much like your music, was able to take me out of my head and provide much comfort in my life. I can't wait to get a copy of the book you two did together, and I expect much more!
My little artist family here, we're all going to send you some artwork and stuff...I hope we can make you smile, too. (I hope you get it, actually...)
Much affection,
Courtney
An admirer of your genius,
Amee
no need to reply, I really get it.